Just Me

FML

2011-12-26T21:09:00.001-07:00

I HATE MY LIFE

Apparently I am gods idea of a joke.

Good Day

2011-08-28T16:05:00.001-06:00

Yesterday was a good day. The best day I've had in a long time. Wyatt said that he wanted to go bowling. So we asked Trish if she and Kadie wanted to come with us. It was great. Not only did Trish and Kadie come but Colten and his girlfriend and a couple of cousins came too. It felt really good to be there with everyone again. It reminded me of when we all went to Boondocks and spent the day up there. It felt like we were a family again. I really miss being with them.

But it was a really good day.

Death

2011-08-17T23:21:00.001-06:00

I really hate my life. I don't want it anymore. I would end it if I had the guts. The other day as I was driving the second half of my route a oncoming coal truck hauling a pup trailer was in my lane, why I don't know. But as we got close he suddenly swerved back into his lane and as we passed each other I narrowly missed hitting his pup trailer. To be completely honest I turned just slightly towards his lane hopeing that we would hit and crash, we missed by a few inches. Part of me was disappointed that we didn't but part of me was glad. I don't think I would still be here if it wasn't for my son. Every time I think of dying I think of him and what it would do to him not having a father around.

A big part of me doesn't want to be here anymore. Other than my son I've lost every reason to keep going. I don't want to do this anymore.

Trish

2011-07-17T23:14:00.000-06:00

It is nearing the one year anniversary of our divorce and yet I still find myself thinking of you every day. I still dream about you. When something happens you are still the first person I want to tell about it.

I still love you Trish. I still dream of a day when we will be able to work things out and be together again. But I also have a more logical side of me telling me that we will never be together again. That the problems we had will never be fully forgotten nor forgiven by either of us.

I hate that you are dating someone. Everytime you say his name or mention him in a conversation I am overcome with some many emotions. I hate him and yet I don't even know him, I've never even met him.

I love you Trish. I don't know if I will ever stop. People ask me all the time if I'm dating anyone and I always just say no. When inside I want to say that I have no desire to ever date anyone again because I still love you.

I will always love you Trish, no matter what.

Life

2011-03-13T22:50:00.002-06:00

Why does life have to suck sometimes. Last year my wife decided that she no longer wanted to be married to me. Now I wasn't of the opinion that things were 100% perfect but I also didn't realize that they were that bad either. I loved my wife, still do. If it were up to me we would still be together. Be we aren't, not for lack of trying on my part anyway. But that brings me to my question. How do I get her back? How do I convince her to give me, us, another chance? I know that I wasn't perfect in our marriage. I know the mistakes I made. But since our divorce I have been working on those things. I have been making these changes in myself not only for her but for myself as well. I look back at our marriage and see a person that I don't like. Someone that I never want to be again. But how do I convince her that I have made these changes for good? How do I convince her that things won't be the same as they were before? I still tell her all the time that I love her. I know that she still loves me too. So what do I do?

2008-05-24T20:28:00.003-06:00

So here is the new toy. Actually, it's a toy hauler. We got it about 2 month's ago and love it. We can fit three 4-wheelers in it. We took it to Little Sahara sand dunes the week after Easter weekend. It was a blast. All of Trish's family went with. We are going out again next weekend, although not to where I want to go. We were suppose to be headed down to Sand Hollow by Hurricane, but everyone that was going to go with us canceled. So now we are just going to go to Kimberly Mountain, which is nearby, and camp out. I am dying to go to Sand Hollow, so if anyone wants to plan a weekend to go down I all for it.

Trish found out the other day that she has carpal tunnel in both of her hands. She will be going in for the first of 2 surgery's next Friday. The aftermath of her surgery's should be interesting. Trish gets claustrophobic and can't stand to wear a wrist brace. Last time the doctor told her to wear one she pulled it off in her sleep and threw it across the room.

The Guys' Rules

2008-04-08T12:58:00.002-06:00

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally, the guys' side of the story.

We always hear "the rules" from the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and look how well things turned out for him.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight. But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Cutest Baby Ever

2008-03-28T12:40:00.004-06:00

People tell me I am biased all the time. But honestly, who can look at this picture of my Wyatt and not admit that he is the cutest baby ever. Huh. Come on, you can admit it. It's OK.

I realized that I haven't posted on here in like 5 months. So here I am. Not much to report. Wyatt keeps us all pretty busy and entertained. I am now driving for my father-in-law full time. It's not my dream job but it will do for now. Plus it's way better than my last job with the state. To many politics and back biting going on there. Everyone was more worried about what everyone else was doing rather than themselves. Anyways, the only big news I have is that we just bought us a toy hauler. It is being delivered today, so I don't have any pictures yet. Trish and I are both totally excited. We have both wanted one for years.

Anywho, that's about it for now. I know we live boring lives but oh well.

I'm All Done.

2007-11-21T04:37:00.000-07:00

I'm all done working for the state. My last day was on Sunday and I have to say that I am very relieved. I hated working there. It was good for the first year while I was working graves. But once I was moved to day's it turned to crap. Apparently, if you want to work days there you need to do a couple of things that I wasn't willing to do.

One, you need to suck up to all the boss's so much that your cheeks hurt the first day.

Second, you have to suck up to all the people that are part of the supervisor's click.

Third, you have to be willing to suppress your creativeness and admit that your supervisor's are the ultimate being's and all of their idea's are superior to everyone else.

Finally number four, you must be willing to accept the fact that if anything happens there, you can't count on any support from your supervisor's. They will turn their backs on you and leave you high and dry no matter if you are in the wrong or not.

Anyway, needless to say, I will never be going back there again. Unless they get rid of a few people and change the way they do some things around there.

Here's the link.

2007-10-14T12:36:00.000-06:00

Here is the link with pics and video's of Wyatt.

http://s234.photobucket.com/albums/ee172/krazeman24/

HE'S HERE!!!!!

2007-09-25T14:38:00.000-06:00

Wyatt Andrew Madsen joined us on Monday September 24, 2007 at 4:16PM. He weigh's in at 7 lbs and 2 oz and is 19 1/2 inches. He is the best birthday present a guy could ask for. That's right, he was born on my birthday. There is absolutely no better present in the world. Everything is going great with mom and baby. The delivery went well and pretty quickly.

I'll post more pictures later and maybe some video's.

Loan $25 to change lives through Kiva.org

2007-06-25T15:36:00.000-06:00

I want to let you all know about a cool non-profit that is doing great things: Kiva.org

Kiva.org allows individuals to make $25 loans to low-income entrepreneurs in the developing world (microfinance). By doing so, individuals like you provide affordable working capital for the poor (money to buy a sewing machine, livestock, etc.), empowering them to earn their way out of poverty.

It's a new, direct and sustainable way to fight global poverty, and the way I see it, I get a higher return on $25 helping someone build a future than the interest my checking account pays.

Anyways, if you have a minute, please check out the site: http://kiva.org. If you need more "reputable" validation than my recommendation :), know that they have received great press in publications ranging from The Wall Street Journal to NPR to BusinessWeek.

Thanks for reading!

Baby Update

2007-06-14T21:39:00.000-06:00

"IT'S A BOY!!!"

Went to the doctor last week and found out that we are having a boy. We are both so FREAKIN' excited, me a little bit more than her though. We decided on the name Wyatt Andrew Madsen.

Anyway, that is the last update here, nothing else to report.

Ciao

The Wedding

2007-04-29T21:30:00.000-06:00

Here it is the first picture of the new wife and kids. The wedding went great and the honeymoon was some much needed time off from work. We went to Las Vegas for a week. My father let us use his timeshare condo at the Hilton. It was so nice, it was basically a one bedroom apartment. It had a full kitchen, laundry machines, everything. Plus on our second night there they imploded the Stardust hotel right next door at 2:30AM. We had no idea that they were doing that. The sound of the fireworks show woke us a little worried. It was so cool to see. I tried to record it, but couldn't find the camera in time.
Anyway, now we are home and in the process of selling Trish's house and buying a new one. The one we are looking is very nice. It is just slightly larger than Trish's now but it has 1 more bedroom and 2 more bathrooms. The guy has done a lot of upgrades to it. There is custom shelving, marble counter tops and completely wired for sound in the kitchen, family room, master bedroom and back yard. Plus, he has built his own putting green in the back yard. So now I will be able to practice my short game.

So that is the lastest happening's here at the Madsen house. Oh yeah, one last thing. Trish is pregnant with our first child. I'M GOING TO BE A PAPA!!!!!

How Strange Are You???

2007-01-11T02:54:00.001-07:00

You Are 50% Strange!

You are a bit strange, though still more normal than strange. You definitely have some quirks, don't get me wrong. But you aren't exactly freaking out old ladies on the street. It's okay though, you've got a healthy mixture of strangeness and normality.

How Strange Are You?
Quizzes for MySpace

I FOUND HER!!!!!!!!!

2006-12-19T20:37:00.000-07:00

I have found the love of my life. Her name is Trish and she has agreed to become my wife for all time and eternity. I am walking on clouds I am so happy. I find myself thinking of her every second of every day. She is the most wonderful and thoughtful person I have ever met. I can't wait to start the rest of my life with her.

Hey Hey

2006-09-24T00:50:00.000-06:00

Well, not much has changed since last time. I wasn't able to get enrolled in school in time for the fall semester, so I'm still chuggin' away at work. I didn't get the job at the high school, I think they already had someone in mind for it. I did apply for a part time job with UPS. But that was almost a month ago and I still haven't heard from them. The job is still listed on their website as open though, so maybe they are just taking their time. Or maybe they are just trying to get applications ready for the up coming holiday season. What ever the reason is I wish they would call already. I really need the extra money. Plus, I am so bored in the afternoons it's scary. I am so bored that I found my old baseball cards and have started to organize them so that I can sell them. So if anyone wants to buy them or knows someone who does let me know. I have a ton of them available.

My friend is now a member of the Federal Prison System. He enter it on the 5th of September. He was suppose to go to Safford, AZ but at the last moment they sent him to Taft, CA. It's a little closer than Safford, so people don't have to drive as far when they go down to see him. That is another reason I really need a part time job. I need to save some money so that I can go visit him.

Latest Happenings

2006-08-18T23:44:00.000-06:00

Here is my latest purchase. I traded in my Toyota for this Dodge 1500. People keep asking me why I bought a bigger gas guzzler, and all I have to say is because I wanted to. Besides, now I can tow my boat without having to borrow somebody else's.

Not much has happened since the last time I posted. I'm just chugging away at work. I applied for a PT job at the high school yesterday. Hopefully I will get it and can start making some extra money. Everybody in the family is doing well. Troy, my brother who just got back from Iraq, is doing just fine. He has resumed his job at the prison and hasn't had any problems adjusting back to normal life. A lot of the guys who went with him over there are having all kinds of problems from what I hear. Tony and his wife just moved from Richfield to Monroe. They are renting a house from a friend of hers while they work out a deal to purchase some land to build a house. I'm not sure how they are going to build a new house when they can't even afford to buy one but they determined to do so.

My friend and his wife just had their 2nd baby today, it was another boy. I don't know what those two were thinking having another child right now. This is the same friend that is going to prison next month for 2 1/2 years. He just does not seem to be thinking straight since this whole thing happened last year. Oh well, it's their lives, I'll just keep silent and hope everything works out for them.

I'm Back

2006-06-27T23:17:00.000-06:00

Well after a much needed vacation I am back. I was nice to be able to take a week and a half off from work and not stress out the whole time wondering what was going to be waiting for me when I got back.

I didn't do much of anything for my vacation. I visited my dad for Father's Day to start it off.

Then on Thursday I went to Cedar City to Welcome Home my brother from Iraq. Yes, he is finally home from the war. It is great to have him home finally. I got a pretty bad sunburn standing in the sun waiting for his plane. We were out there for 1 1/2 hours waiting and I never thought about sun screen. Oh well.

On Saturday I went with my friend and his family to Lagoon. His company was have a party and he was able to get the tickets cheap through his work. I get motion sickness really bad and was unable to ride most of the rides there. I even had on a motion sickness patch to help but it didn't work, I still got really sick.

Today my friend who is going to prison got his sentence. He will be going for 30 months, 25 with good behavior. At some point he will have to go back east for a counseling program that is required for all people in his situation. The program is a 24 month program and he won't go until they have an opening. But no matter when he goes, he will only serve a total of 30 months. It really sucks that all this has happened.

HOORAY

2006-06-13T23:12:00.000-06:00

My brother is finally back on American soil. His unit arrived in Mississippi yesterday and they all made it home safe and sound. Not a single person from his unit was killed in the 18 months they were in Iraq. Which is pretty amazing since the unit the was there before them lost 10 guys and the unit that just replaced them lost 4 guys on my brothers last day there. But it's not the first time that the Triple Deuce has come back from a war without a single fatality. Anyway, they will have to stay in Mississippi for about a week for their debriefing and such, then they will get to come home to Utah.

Latest Happenings

2006-06-09T04:24:00.000-06:00

Well, yesterday my brother left Iraq for the start of his long journey home. We still don't know exactly when he will be home but at least he is out of the middle of the fighting. He was in Ramadi which is where all the action is at right now. His last day there they were bombed and mortared harder than any other day in the 18 months they were there. 4 people where killed on his last day there, not from his unit but the one that just replaced them.

I just finished my 3 day PCS training. I am so sore from that training. I got stuck with the group of people that just could not grasp the maneuvers. I got tossed more times than I cared to be. Which would have been ok if we were suppose to be tossing people, which we weren't. We were suppose to be doing moves that basically swung them around in a circle that lowered them gently to the ground. But like I said, my group just could not figure out the moves. I had to come home and use my TENS unit for an hour before my muscles would relax enough to where they didn't hurt anymore. But at least I passed the course. Now I have to go back every 6 months for a 1 day review and in 1 year I will be certified.

I did it!

2006-05-30T23:42:00.000-06:00

I got my letter yesterday from the State telling me that I had passed the counselor exam. Now when a counselor position opens up I will be automatically entered for the position. Which is awesome because they pay counselors so much more than they do tech's, which is what I am now. But for now I am still stuck on graves working with people I don't really care for. All everybody seems to do around here is bitch and moan about everything that happens. But I am slowly working my way on up.
Next week I have to go to Salt Lake again for another training class. This one is a 3 day PCS class (Positive Control Systems). This is the class that teaches you to restrain the kids when they get out of control and also how to defend yourself if they should have a weapon of some kind. It should be fun but at the same time I am worried about my back and knees getting aggravated.

Getting Tired

2006-05-17T23:47:00.000-06:00

I just got back yesterday from another training session. This one was a two day conference in Salt Lake. Every employee in the JJS Division had to attend this conference. Of course there were two different conferences so that everyone could go, we didn't just leave the kids locked in their rooms for 2 days. Anyway, it was kind of a pointless conference. Most of what they did there I had already been through when I when to my 2 week academy training. Then in 2 1/2 weeks I have to go back to Salt Lake for a 3 day training class. This one is on PCS (Positive Control System) which is what we use to restrain the kids when needed. I really am getting tired of all the traveling for training. But after this next one I should be done for a while. We are required to have 40 hours of training every year. I shouldn' t have to go to anymore until after July 1st. We go by the fiscal year, so July 1st is the start of the new year. But I will have an entire year to get my 40 hours in then. Maybe after I am done with this next training I will take off for a couple of weeks vacation. I have 80+ hours of comp time that I need to use before they get after me for having so much.

Funny Email

2006-05-04T04:48:00.000-06:00

This is an email that I received from a co-worker the other day.

Dear Mrs. Fenton,

Over the past six months, your husband, Mr. Bill Fenton has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this type of behavior and have considered banning the entire family from shopping in any of our stores.
We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. Three of our clerks are attending counseling from the trouble your husband has caused. All complaints against Mr. Fenton have been compiled and are listed below.

Mr. Wally Underpants
President and CEO of Wal-Mart Complaint Department

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

MEMO
Re: Mr. Bill Fenton - Complaints - 15 Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse/partner is shopping:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares... and watched what happened.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite
them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry and asks Why can't you people just leave me alone?

9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.

10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.

11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. December 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"

(And; last, but not least!)

15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door and waited a while; then, yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

Waiting

2006-04-21T00:11:00.000-06:00

So I went and took the counselor test on Monday in Salt Lake. It was 1 1/2 hours long and was a video test. I thought it was going to drag on forever being that long, but it went by extremely fast. Now I have to wait for 3 weeks to find out my results. They send off the answer sheets to another company to have them scored then I get a letter in the mail stating whether I passed or failed. No score of any kind just a passed or failed. If I pass then I am placed on the waiting list in order of how well I scored on the test. The human resource office is told how well I did on the test but not me. So if I pass I still don't know where I am on the waiting list.

Tony (my brother) and I have started to spend one night a week with Tyler (our nephew). He is having a hard time with his father being gone and is starting to act up. So Tony and I are taking him and spending time with him so he can have some male influence since all he has right now is his mom and sister. Last week we hung a sheet in my mom's basement then hooked up the Playstation to the projector and surround sound and played video games all night on the projected big screen. He loved it, probably more so because he kicked our butt's, not that we let him. For an eight year old he is damn good at the video games. I'm not sure what we are going to do this week. Tony hurt his back so we can't go bowling like we were planning, maybe we'll go mini golfing.

Troy has about 2 more months before he comes home. Everyone is starting to get excited to finally have him back here, where he is safe. They were hoping that they would be able to come back in May but he said it's not looking too good for that to happen. We'll just have to wait and see and keep our fingers crossed that things change.

Day 10, Last Day

2006-04-11T23:09:00.000-06:00

The test today went well. Everyone in the class passed. It wasn't nearly as bad as I was thinking it would be. I passed with a 97%, highest in the class. I thought for sure the girl in front of me would do better since she only missed one question on the first test. So I get to keep my job. Speaking of my job, I will be driving back to S.L. on Sunday for the 4th week in a row. On Monday the 17th I will be taking another test. If I pass that test I will become a counselor, which means I get a pay raise. It should be the first step of many on my way to the top.

Day 9

2006-04-06T21:12:00.000-06:00

Tomorrow is D-Day #2 for us. The test tomorrow is going to have about 95 questions on it. Plus, the questions will be on was said in class as well as what is in the manual. I don't think I can remember what was said in class. They told us at the beginning of the training that everything on the test is in the manual. So naturally I didn't take any notes because everything is suppose to be in the manual. So I am freaking out a little right now.
On to today's events. Today was an alright day. The topics for today were "Working with Sexual Offenders" and "Emotional Stages of Mental Illness". The first topic was not very informative. There were about 5 different trainers and none of them explained their portion of the topic very well. The second topic was interesting, at least to me, mainly because I have a pretty good knowledge of that topic already. I worked the last 4 1/2 years with the mentally ill and disabled.
Well I better go and study some more, I don't want to fail the test and lose my job.

Day 8

2006-04-05T17:03:00.000-06:00

Once again today started off bad. The speaker that was suppose to show up last week but was out of town didn't show up again. He was at conference in St. George speaking to a group of judges. So we got to spend 4 hours this morning watching his training video. Sitting there listening to trainers when they are there is bad enough, but when you have to watch a 4 hour video it is all that much worse. Then the person that was suppose to come in the afternoon called to say that she had thrown her back out and would not be able to come. So they had to find someone else to come in the afternoon. It was either that or we have the rest of the day off and be forced to use our vacation time for those 4 hours.

Day 7

2006-04-04T18:19:00.000-06:00

Today wasn't looking too good. The topic was on Cultural Competency. We once again had two trainers doing the tag team thing. They kind of got off to a slow and boring start but after awhile they got better. The only thing I didn't like about todays training was all the group activities that we did. Although, they weren't bad activities and were a little fun to do, I just prefer to listen to them talk.
I am contemplating the purchase of a business. I have wanted to own a business for the last 10 years and this one looks to be a somewhat good investment. It is kind of a family fun center type business. I would have to look at the business and its numbers a little more, but I am seriously considering it. I want to go look at it first, but it is about 5 hours away from my house. If I buy it I don't think that I would move up there close to it. I would just run it from my home. So one of the problems in owning it and not living close by is if anything goes wrong I'm not right there to fix the problem. We'll see what happens though.

Day 6

2006-04-04T18:01:00.000-06:00

Today I am back for my 2nd week of training. The day has started off a little ruff. There was a accident on the freeway involving some spilled Port-A-Potties. The accident shut down the freeway, so half of the class was 45 minutes late.
Today's trainer wasn't that bad. Actually, we had two tainers doing a tag team training all day. They did training on writing incident reports and security procedures. It was actually really informative.
My date with Kellie a few weeks ago went pretty well. The conversation never really had a low point, which is normally a problem when I go on dates. I think we both had a pretty good time, I know I did. But I don't think there is any hope of it going any further. She clearly stated the she doesn't want to move away from here family. I just moved south and am not interested in moving again. It took me over 2 years to get back down to Monroe and I don't plan on moving away anytime soon. But the date was a good experience and good practice for me.

Day 5

2006-04-01T23:36:00.000-07:00

Today is D-day for us. If we don't pass today's test then we loose our jobs. Which could really suck, because I just move to Monroe because I got this job. So I really can't afford to fail this test. Although, we are allowed to take a make up test on the parts we miss.
We'll we just took the test. I am felling pretty good about it. We won't find out how we did for a couple of hours thought. Now we get to listen to the next trainer and try to remember all she says for the next test in 2 weeks.
We just got our test results back and I did really well. I scored a 94% only missing 3 questions. 2 of the 3 I didn't know and guessed, but the 3rd question I don't know what I was thinking, because I know the answer but marked a different one. So I still have a job for now, but we will see how the 2nd week goes.
I'm suppose to go on that date tonight and still don't know what we are going to do. Whatever we do it is going to be crowded, being Friday night and all. Plus, I still have to clean my truck inside and out, which won't be easy, it has been awhile since I last cleaned it.

Day 4

2006-03-30T00:23:00.000-07:00

Last night I called Kellie (the girl my dad works with). I was totally shocked with myself for calling her. I never would have bet on myself to just call her like that. Anyway, we are going out on Friday night. I still don't know what we are going to do. Dinner and a movie has been done to death, so we'll see what happens.
On to today's training session. Today we will be having a trainer on drugs. All day long it will be the same thing. It should be really interesting to hear what they have to say.
Today was quite interesting. Since I didn't know much about drugs to begin with I learned a lot. I now know what to look for when the kids come into the facility.

Day 3

2006-03-30T00:16:00.000-07:00

So far, today isn't looking to good. They gave us a new book, in addition to the 2" 3-ringed binder we already have, full of group activities. I don't really care for group activities, I'd rather sit here and listen to them talk. But-of-course that is because of my lack of confidence.
So the activities weren't all that bad. I really only participated in one of the three. I was able to get out of the first and third activities. Our instructor was bugging me to death. She looked like and had a lot of the same manorizims as Jennifer (Tony's wife). Which isn't good because she bugs me so bad. Seriously, the two of the could almost be twins. The rest of the day was pretty good. The trainer in the afternoon talked about gangs and all the different ones in Salt Lake. I didn't know that there is over 250 different gangs in Utah.

Day 2

2006-03-28T17:54:00.000-07:00

Well I'm starting day two today. Yesterday wasn't all that bad, although I did have a hard time staying awake through a couple of trainers. The last trainer was one of my favorites. She was also a trainer at one of my other trainings. She is really good at keeping your attention and involving you in the topic. Too bad she only speaks once in the entire 2 weeks.
Last night my dad said that he was going to get me that girls number so that I could call her. He has done that before and I never called the girl. Right now I am all pumped up to call her and have a good idea of what to say. But we'll see what actually happens and if he does in-fact get her number. Not that I have a lot of time to go out with her this week. I am in training all week, then on Saturday and Sunday I am helping my friend move. So who knows when she and I will be able to do something, that is if I can get up the nerve to call her.
We just found out that our trainer that was suppose to fill the entire day is out of town for the week. So now we are just sitting here waiting to see if they can get any of the other trainers scheduled this week to come in.
They found someone to come in, he was scheduled to train during the second week, they also found someone for the afternoon. So we don't get the day off. I guess it's better this way, now we won't have to make up the day later.
There is a girl in class that I want to ask out, but I'm sure of her situation. She has a ring on but it doesn't look like a wedding ring. Plus she hasn't said anything about being married. We have talked a little bit, not 1-on-1, but in a small (4 people) group. I know that she just moved to Provo to go to college, so I'm not sure if she is interested in a long distance relationship.

Day 1

2006-03-28T16:26:00.000-07:00

Today, Monday March 20th, I started my first week of a 2 week training session for work. We'll see how it goes. Everyone from work has said that it is a pointless training, everything they teach is common sense. So Far it's not too bad, but if I don't pass the two exams I will be fired. So , there is motivation to pay attention.
I have spent the entire first day of training by myself. I don't know why I have such a hard time meeting new people. I think it has something to do with my low self-esteem. When I am alone or around people I know I don't feel like I have a self-esteem problem. Maybe it's more of a confidence problem than a self-esteem problem. Whatever it is I need to address it and get over it. But how do you get over something when you aren't sure of what the problem is. My problem is not only preventing me from making new friends but also from meeting girls. I am really tired of being single. I want to meet someone and start a family already. I am the last one in my family. All my brothers are married and have kids. Why can't I meet someone who has the same wants and goals as me, relationship wise. I have been set-up on blind dates as well as dates of my own. But I never seem to make a connection with any of them. I always seem to find something about them that bothers me. Maybe I am being too picky, but I don't want to settle for just anyone.
My dad wants me to go out with a girl from his work., but she is strong in the church am I am not. The church isn't something that I want to be involved with right now. Ever since my divorce when the bishop blamed me for my ex-wife having an affair, I just don't care about or want to be associated with the LDS religion. I don't know what I what I believe religion wise. And the church has so many things that I don't understand or agree with. Anyway, back to the girl, with her being strong LDS, I don't know how it could possibly work out. But I'll give it a go and see what happens.

Bad News

2006-03-05T05:03:00.000-07:00

Well my friend that I mentioned before has officially hit the bottom. He called me yesterday and told me that he has taken a plea bargain and will be going to prison for a max of 5 years. I feel really bad for him cause he has a 2 year old son and another child on the way. What he did to get into trouble was extremely stupid and nothing more than a temporary lapse in judgment. But nevertheless he has to pay the consequences. Luckly, he will probably be going to a minimum security federal prison. I feel so bad for him and his family and wish I could do something for him. On the other hand I am also very pissed at him. I know it sounds selfish, very selfish. He and I have been friends for nearly 20 years. He was one of the first friends I made after my parents divorced and my mother moved us away. I don't have many friends and he has always been somone that I could count on the be there for me and to talk to whenever I need advice. I don't know what I am going to do without him around. We are so close that he feels more like a brother to me than a friend. At least we will have most of the summer to spend time with him. He probably will not have to report to the prison until July maybe August. Hopefully, we will be able to do some camping or go to the lake.

Fourth Post

2006-02-15T01:48:00.000-07:00

Well yesterday was Valentine's Day, or in my case Singles Awareness Day. I seriously hate that holiday. Not only because I am single, but what is the point to it. People will say it is so you can show your significant other how much you love and appreciate them. I say, if your mate doesn't already know how much you love and appreciate them then you need to start being a little more attentive to them. Why do we need a specific date to do something special for our lovers?

Enough of that, on to some uplifting news. I have been able to spend some time with my brother who, if you will recall from my earlier post, is home on leave from Iraq. He has had some interesting stories to tell. The HumVee he was riding in has been hit twice. Both times he has been able to come out of it without a scratch. Although, one of the hits caused a massive bruise all down his leg. But the first time he was hit has a really interesting story to go along with it, but not by him. My mother had a dream one night and in her dream she saw her brother, grandparents, great-grandparents and others who have all past on. They said that they were going to be there in 10 days. Well, my mother had no idea what was in 10 days. When my brother was telling us about the first time he was hit he said it was on August 10th. My mother broke out in tears and we had no idea why. She told us that she had had her dream 10 days before that date. When they said that they would be there in 10 days they meant to protect my brother. He then told us that when they were hit that a piece of the bomb had gone through the window, took out the drivers jaw went past my brothers head bounced off the door frame and hit one of the guys in the back seat sitting behind the driver. There were 4 guys in that HumVee, 2 were LDS members and 2 were not. The 2 that were hit were the non members. I have fallen away from the LDS church over the years, but hearing that story started to stir something inside me. I have been thinking of going back to church. I haven't decided for sure, but we'll see what happens.

Third Post

2006-02-06T16:26:00.000-07:00

Apparently, the ref's were for the Steelers to win last night. I can't believe how many bad calls there were in the game. But oh well it's over with and congrat's to the Steelers for a game well played.

I was at least able to watch the game with a close friend of mine who is going through a really tough time right now. Since I moved south a few month's ago I haven't been able to spend as much time with him. So it was nice to see him, his wife and kid. That little kid is growing up so fast. He just learned how to walk this last week. So now he walking all over the place.

Second Post

2006-02-04T22:48:00.000-07:00

Well today was a pretty good day. My brother came home from Iraq on a 15 day leave. He and his wife surprised the kids with his visit. They had no idea he was coming home until he walked into the room. They were both a little shocked to see him there. His daughter even asked her mom, "Is that really dad or someone wearing a wig?" But once the initial shock wore off they ran over to him and haven't left his side yet.
The Super Bowl is just under 17 hours away. Who ever thought that the Steelers and the Seahawks would be the two teams to make it this year. My money was on the Colts, going into the playoffs with only 2 losses. But then again, if I had things my way either the Patriots or the 49ers would be in the big game. So, if I had to choose a team right now I would have to go with the Seahawks. It seems like everyone is leaning towards the Steelers and I always go with the underdog when it comes to the Super Bowl. I guess we'll just have to wait and see.

First Entry

2006-02-01T01:36:00.000-07:00

Well I figured since everyone else in the world was blogging I would give in and start one of my own. There probably won't be much on here because not much happens in my life. I have so many things that I want to say but I'm not sure if people reading this will understand that it is just a way for me to vent.

Anyways, we'll see how this thing goes. I may or may not continue this thing, we'll see.